Outdoorsy Stuff. And Product Claims, pfffttt.

Friday, September 18, 2015

Tryin' to get a smattering of things done outdoors before the show starts, before it gets too cold, because hey!!!, on a back yard roll lately yay (here and here), ya know.


Alas, so much for grand plans (I'm wiggling my fingers around in the air over "grand plans" btw) of completing bigger cooler projects.  Instead I got the east fence re-stained and a black metal chair gooped with steel weld epoxy.  

Embarrassingly small amount of check marks.  Although!  I did get three and a half weeks of dinners mapped out and that my friends is a major feat for me.  I even went so far as to pre-chop up, pre-prep a pile o' chicken for three recipes which never ever ever happens.  Who am I?!?

So, I've always been a big epoxy fan, not sure why.  Gone through many a tube in my day, yeah.  Such a great glue.  Oddly, epoxy has been awol from my life for the last several years.  Not sure why.  Sniffle, I miss it.  I need to epoxy more I think.

Two of the three black metal chairs that I looohovehovehove that Mike dislikes have a coupla' busted slats.

Broke!  Doh!
Broken welds.  Unfortunately, I am not a welder though I did try it once mmph mmph years ago and it's neat.

Oooff, broke too!
Scanning through the weekly Menards ad I saw steel weld epoxy* on sale and thought huh.  Wonder if that would work on these chairs.  It alleges all sorts of fantastical claims, as every product does (right?!), so we shall see.

Here's the one I gave a whirl.

Fascinating imagery here of an epoxy product encased in its original packaging.
A test on one of the two busted up chairs, see if it does everything it says it will.  Mike suggested rivets which actually is not such a far-fetched idea despite the less than desirable concept of drilling holes; it might only work on the middle parts though.

Just as with any other epoxy, pop it open, squeeze out a blob trying to be as even with both sides as possible, give it a healthy mix, then glop it onto your desired spot.

May not be enough overlap for rivets on the ends here.
Clamps were necessary as the floppy parts would not connect otherwise.

Smushy clampy clampy.
Of course as soon as I do that, I look up at the sky:  doom and gloom.  I check the radar....

Ack!  Oops.
Eh, it should be fine.  Instructions said it sets in four minutes, cures in four hours.  The real test will be sitting in the chair.  Or maybe just removing the clamps, I dunno.  I mean yeah, of course I'm dubious, it's epoxy not a weld.

A guaranteed update right there folks!  

Hopefully I can mete out some cash for new cushions.  Ah!  I already have fabric!  Yay, how fortuitous!  Sweet!

Also on tap was the fence, as I announced above.

Hey hey, before!  Which I didn't really mind for it's visual texture-y.
Last month I swooped through Home Depot (gasp, I know, right?!) (I must've needed something that Menards doesn't have as that does happen on a rare occasion.) (Or wait, maybe it was a paint mis-mix drop in visit.) and found a can of semi-transparent stain in a color sorta somewhat kinda similar to the existing fence color.  For nine bucks, eh, I thought hey, ok, why not.

All right, a can of stain-ish stuff!  Nice.
Plus, as this Behr semi-transparent waterproofing all in one kinda made the short list of future stain options for the deck, it gave me a great opportunity to run it through its paces.  Well, enough so.

Enough so that I won't use it for the deck.

After I got home I read reviews online and oh, oops, not flattering.  Hm.  Most said it flakes, chips, peels, wears off way faster than it claims.  Ah, see?  Again with the product claims (8 years on fences and siding!  Covers 600 sq. ft!).  I get so tired of product claims, like really, had it up to here....

Anywhooo....

Once done with the project, I ascertained several things: 

One:  semi-transparent deck stain means pretty well darn near opaque, or, not what I thought it meant.   Or at least so with this particular brand.  Good to find out now as transparent stain is what I will select for the deck instead.  I like to see the grain, the knots, the wood, that it used to be a tree ya know?

Part way done, for comparison.
Two:  this stuff, I can see why it would crack, peel, flake, etc.  It's an acrylic based "stain" meaning it essentially sits on the surface, never truly absorbing into the wood.  While these fence boards sucked it right in because they were so parched, it did not become one with the wood as a stain would.  ohmmm...

Crap, I hope I don't have to sand the whole damn fence next year.  Uuuggghhhh.  Well, on the bright side, at least I have a spiffy new sander.

Three:  the finish is, well, um, rather flat, dull, one-dimensional.  For my taste, I should qualify.  I made Mike go look at it in the daylight and he didn't say a single word about it, so, hm, maybe he's unimpressed too.

Maybe I'm just not a super fan of the color either?  I mean, I'm not entirely but I was hoping to be.  It's so...what's the word...predictable.  I do see how someone could like it though.  Maybe I'm just so used to the fence the way it was.  Change, ya know.

Alllllmost done!  It got hot in the sun.  It was an absolutely gorgeous day.
Four:  coverage listed on the can was way way way overzealous.

Done!
If anything, the boards have a product on them now so I can feel ok about them going through another winter.  Considering it's not our fence and we like our neighbors so much, it's important to help maintain it.

Done too!  As you can see at the top, I cut in the edges with a brush and it looks way different than the rolled parts.  Sigh.  Plus, if I overlapped, it got worse, really opaque.
And in the end too, it was a worthwhile nine dollar purchase because I learned.  We'll see if it was a real actual good purchase product-wise.  Yes, I just rolled my eyes and shook my head a little.

Well all right.  This is a temporary farewell as Monday is the big Start on Pilot Day.  Hopefully I can get one or two or hopefully maybe three or more interesting things accomplished in the next month, or at least have something intriguing to share with you.  

Thanks for reading this far, I truly appreciate it.  Truly.  Bear with me, my friends, and I'll see you mid-ish-October!  xo

*The steel weld epoxy link is an Amazon affiliate link.  Mwah, thanks!  Please see the "boring stuff" tab above for more info.

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